Relationship is to seduce and charm the victim. I also didn’t know that the second step is to isolate the victim. Now, Connor did domestic violence attorney Tucson not come home one day and announce, You know, hey, all this Romeo and Juliet stuff has been great, but I need to move into the next phase where I isolate you and I abuse you so I need to get you out of this apartment where the neighbors can hear you scream and out of this city where you have friends and family and coworkers who can see the bruises.
Instead, Connor came home one Friday evening and he told me that he had quit his job that day, his dream job, and he said that he had quit his job because of me, because I had made him feel so safe and loved that he didn’t need to prove himself on Wall Street anymore, and he just wanted to get out of the city and away from his abusive, dysfunctional family, and move to a tiny town in New England where he could start his life over with me by his side. Now, the last thing I wanted to do was leave New York.
And my dream job, but I thought you made sacrifices for your soulmate, so I agreed, and I quit my job, and Connor and I left Manhattan together. I had no idea I was falling into crazy love, that I was walking headfirst into a carefully laid physical, financial and psychological trap.
The next step in the domestic violence pattern is to introduce the threat of violence and see how she reacts. And here’s where those guns come in. As soon as we moved to New England — you know, that place where Connor was supposed to feel so safe he bought three guns.
It happened twice more on the honeymoon. The first time, I was driving to find a secret beach and I got lost, and he punched me in the side of my head so hard that the other side of my head repeatedly hit the driver’s side window. And then a few days later, driving home from our honeymoon, he got frustrated by traffic, and he threw a cold Big Mac in my face. Connor proceeded to beat me once or twice a week for the next two and a half years of our marriage.